The fat lady is back...

As you have probably noticed, I was sinking into a depression and dieting failure, placating myself with beer and fast food.  So, I took charge and gave my 2 week notice at work. I felt immediate relief.

My dieting has been a different story. After my long binge eating session, I ended up in a yo-yo half South Beach half junk diet.  The good news is that I am at 191.6, so I haven't gained the weight back I worked so hard at trying to lose; but, I haven't lost any weight either which, of course, is to be expected for naughty people like me.

I have no excuses for my behavior, but I have noticed this trend whenever I try to lose weight: I start to hover around 190 pds,, start getting nervous, and then end up sabotaging my entire diet.  It is not that this diet is even all that restrictive, because I have done plenty of cheating and still manage to lose weight.  This will require more thought, because the 180s are looking very appealing right now.

hmmm.....

Mc Donald's.  Need I say anymore.

Beer...

Iv'e been imbibing in too much beer lately and it is wreaking havoc on my diet!  I have always enjoyed alcoholic beverages occasionally; especially on a relaxing week end, but I think it is affecting my waistline.  I shouldn't try to fool myself--I know it is.  After all, it is one of the choices on the 'to avoid" list in the South Beach book. It not only has lots of carbs in it, but it also causes the munchies for more carbs.  I knew this issue was going to come up, because I do like my beer.  Grrr, now I am afraid to step on the scale.  Do you think I should give it a try?  Ok, be right back--193.4.  I did gain back a couple of pounds as I knew I would, because I could just feel it on my body clinging to me, as those nasty fat cells do, like wet jeans after you jump into a cold lake.

Ok, no time to cry over spilled beer. It is time to get back my resolve and start to behave myself again.  Bahhhh, behaving is no fun, but my body will thank me for it in the long run; then I will be a singing skinny lady with the health and wellness I need to chase around my active grandchild and even more active husband. Hee! Hee!

Having a bit of a stand still reading super charged South beach. Also having a stand still in the activity department. I will update when I get myself together here.

I did it...

I ended up eating that high glycemic, but satisfying dinner I was looking for since last week end.  My daughter and grandbaby came over and we ordered out Italian.  I had the spaghetti and meatballs in this lovely tomato sauce.  It came with garlic bread, but guilt dictated that I give it to my daughter and grandbaby which they appreciated.  I did have a salad also; they make the best house salads. Cannoli for dessert, of course.

 Immediately afterwards, I started to get that heavy sleepy feeling that you get when piling in the refined carbs, but it is done.   No time to mourn the weight loss that this will inevitably disrupt, but I will prevail because I still have my mind set on this adventure, and will continue to pursue it with even greater fervor than before this lapse in judgement and dieting decorum.

Ha! Ha! Ha!

Will I falter???

I am now down to 191.6.  I haven't been feeling any particular cravings as of late, but last week I wanted a Culver's hamburger and fries.  Yes, the hamburger and fries have usurped the potato chips!  At least for now.

There were really no good food choices at the pot luck: I ended up eating the offered fare in smaller portions, but didn't feel satisfied from high glycemic treats as I would normally do.  Is my body chemistry changing?  Is my palate really enjoying cleaner eating? I know my digestive system always gets disrupted in a very negative way after eating these foods, so maybe I shouldn't eat them. Ha!

I do notice that the pounds seem to melt off faster when I incorporate some kind of activity on a regular basis; I only hope I can keep it up, because I can get so lazy, especially as it gets colder outside.

I ended up getting the Supercharge South Beach diet book in the mail yesterday.  I will read it for future reinforcement and reference in this dieting craze I am in.

Oh boy...

Down to 193.2.  Walked to to post office yesterday; it was quite a trek, I am thinking that is the reason for said weight loss.  Will I be bad today?  I have a pot luck to go to, and probably limited South beach choices.  I guess we will see.

behaved...

I behaved today; when I really wanted a hamburger and greasy french fries, I had a salad with 2 nicely sauteed chicken tenders and lots of veg from the garden.  Yum, I guess.  At least my body will be thanking me.

resolve delayed...

I seemed to have my mind set on eating some bad food this week. Yesterday I was called off work and invited myself to my daughter's for supper. I ended up bringing fatty artichoke dip, chips, cheese and crackers, etc.  I was very sick afterwords from the richness of these foods; then I went to work today and ended up coming home early, went grocery shopping, and bought chips and junk; and then I ate junk along with beer.

Sorry, had a big long vent about work, but had to take it off; hubster says it is politically incorrect to complain about work situations online. Felt good at the time though.

Next 2 days off for self reflection and, hopefully, self control.

Now that it is over...

The wedding week end is done, and I'd say overall I didn't do too badly.  Some of these restaurants weren't all that good.  For instance the holiday Inn we stayed at had good room service, but in the restaurant we had the prepacked heated up food you'd find at Chlies or Applebees; doesn't anyone take raw food and cook it anymore?  The chicken I ordered did have grill marks on it, but that was the only highlight. The green beans were limp and coated in a weird sweet sauce, and my ceasar salad was wilted.  So, it went on like that; maybe I am just used to eating real whole food right now--that is a good thing.

Have had plenty of produce from the garden, making stuffed peppers with my peppers from my garden, tuna salad in tomato cups(tomatoes are bountiful this year), and lots of pickles and salads.

So, resolve continues, although I won't step on the scale for a few days, just to be on the safe side. Ha! Ha!

Nervous...

Well, the wedding is tomorrow, and I lost the 10 pounds I was hoping to lose-not thin, but don't feel as heavy and bloated, thanks to cleaner food.  I almost went off the wagon early yesterday: my daughter and I didn't feel like cooking, so we went to Culvers. I wanted a greasy hamburger and fries, but ended up with a cup of chili and a salad.  Of course fast food, no matter what it is, is not good for you, but I think given the alternatives, I did pretty good.

Tonight will be another obstacle, because we will be hoteling it and eating out.  I will try to continue to behave based on food choices offered; but tomorrow, I make no promises, although I feel a little nervous and guilty about it.  Maybe, I will simply stick to my resolve and continue to choose the legal foods. nahhhh! I really doubt it!  LOL!