arghhhhh.......

Too much Halloween candy...

fun, fun...

Halloween feast night was fun.  Everyone came with huge appetites and ended up eating all the spaghetti.  That crock pot spaghetti sauce is one of the best recipes I have run across; I actually found it years ago in a Taste of Home magazine.  The cutest thing was when little guy was swinging a noodle in front of his face just staring at it, and then shoved it in his mouth fast as he could!

Now I feel like I need to get back on the diet: the weight is attaching itself to me again like thick dense clay on a shovel.  That is when it takes a lot of spraying with the hose, or, in my case, lots of walking and diet discipline.  I know, I'm a lot of talk, but if I don't continue to berate myself for naughty days, I won't feel like I am making any progress.  Hee! Hee!

Can't believe it...

I went ahead and stepped on the scale out of some perverse curiosity, and was pleasantly surprised that I have been maintaining 191 pounds.  Must be all the walks I have been taking, because it sure isn't my eating regiment.  Of course,  I would really like to drop some more weight off, but one thing at a time.

This weekend I am making a Halloween feast:  Crock pot spaghetti sauce, garlic bread, a salad with pastrami and black olives, and Halloween poke cake(this is a marble cake that has orange jello poured over it, and topped with chocolate frosting and candy pumpkins. Yummmm!)  Diet food?  Nahhhh!  But, it will be delicious. What do you think makes the fat lady fat anyway!  Ha! Ha!

mmmmm...

Made a yummy winter vegetable soup today. It had sweet potato, rutabaga, and cabbage along with all the other usual soup fixings.  It went really well with the leftover Irish brown bread.

I would have to say that, besides the cookie I had, along with my sensible breakfast, I have been doing fairly well in the dieting world today. Still won't step on the scale though. Na! Aa! Won't deliver that pain to my psyche today.

Thinking of making some whole wheat bread. I haven't done that in awhile and the thought of getting my hands into some dough sounds good about right now.  Just as soon I buy yeast that is...

dieting...

Yeah.  Someday I will get back to that.

review...

I thought I'd give a review on the vegetarian pub dinner party. I'd have to say that the ploughman's platter was the hit of the night: the bread was actually really good, especially slathered in butter; the pickles went great with beer; I ended up buying an Amish blue cheese that was fabulous with the granny smith apple; the other cheese I purchased was Dubliner(Irish cheese with stout) which was very smooth and creamy for a seeming hard-looking cheese.  And, then when everyone thought that was enough already, I brought out the English chips(potato nuggets) that roasted perfectly in the oven. They were fabulous with the malt vinegar dipping sauce.  The recipe called for the potatoes to be soaked in cold water for a half hour, and then patted very dry before roasting--they turned out perfectly with this technique.

I think we could have called it quits there, because, in my opinion, the lager stew that followed was lacking any really rich flavor. It just tasted like vegetable floating in tomato sauce to me.  The pasties weren't that great either with the crust being kind of tough, and silly me forgetting to put the gruyere cheese in them; but instead, putting it on top.

The beer was good. Hubby went out and bought a variety pack--gotta love that option.

And, don't forget, a wonderful chocolate cake, made by daughter, with coffee flavored butter frosting. Delicious!

Overall, a good time.

black frosting...

Black frosting is the coolest thing for a grandma to watch a baby eat.  Last night I bought a Frankenstein head cake from the store for dessert.  It had a green face and black hair.  When we gave it to little guy he squished it between his little fingers and then shook his little hands which brought squeals of delight from his grandma.  Afterwards, we all had black stained lips and tongues, and baby had stained fingers as well which prompted a quick bath that was enjoyed very much by all.  Gotta love Halloween!

Ok...

Positive thinking today.  The sun is shining,  had a bowl of Uncle Sam Cereal(South Beach Approved) with berries, and I am going for a walk.

Happy Birthday to hubby and daughter.

Tonight is the big vegetarian pub grub feast: should be interesting.  My daughter and I tried the pickles last night. They really pack a spicy punch!  Should go well with strong cheese, dense bread, and beer, of course.  I just hope heartburn and gut drop aren't on the menu afterwards. Hee! Hee!

won't do it...

I am not going to step on the scale for awhile; besides, I can feel the weight gain in how my clothes have been fitting lately--not good.
Invited daughter and grandbaby over for supper tonight: chicken tetrezini is is on the menu.  I am using whole wheat pasta--that is as far as the healthy part of this dish goes.   But, I am including broccoli which is, of course, good for you.
I have been continuing my walks, because I so enjoy the brisk fresh air and all the fall decorations in front of people's houses. I usually meet a dog or 2 on these walks.  They will run up to me, sniff my hand, and take a pet before bounding off because their master is calling them. Then I get the apology for the unleashed dog, and I always say, " That's Ok, I meet a lot of dogs on my walks."  The funny thing is I don't even like dogs; although, I don't seem to mind them on my walks. Weird.

hm!

That felt good! Think I will keep posting, good or bad. Wasn't that my initial idea anyway?

Well, well...

The fat lady has been in a bit of a quandary as of late.  My diet has gone to the birds, and that doesn't mean the kind you eat, but the lack of any real interest in it.  All my initial excitement is gone for the moment, because quitting a job after working for so long has left me kind of in a strange place--lost I guess you could say, so thinking of healthy eating is the last thing on my mind; although, I do continue to half-hearted try to make attempts at it.  Today I made a nice omelet with spinach, peppers, and mushrooms, and for lunch a fish dish with lots of nice fresh veggies. After that the whole dieting resolve went away with brandy old fashioneds, sushi, leftover chicken dinner(with potatoes, of course), pretzels, nuts, chocolate, and ice cream bars. Was that a long enough list?
It has only been a week and a half: everyone tells me to just take some time to myself to regroup: good advice, but I always have this nagging feeling that I need to get back to work soon or I will go insane.  Is it years of work brainwashing or self preservation?  A little of both I suppose.  Oh, well.
In the meantime, I am making vegetarian pub food for the hubby this weekend for his birthday dinner. This dinner will include homemade pickles that I made today, Irish brown bread that I am going to make,  Irish cheeses, and tart apples as the first course, followed directly by homemade English chips(or potato nuggets by american standards) with a malt vinegar dipping sauce.  The main course will be Cornish pasties with gruyere cheese(YUMM) and a nice Irish lager stew.  For dessert my daughter is bringing a chocolate cake with chocolate frosting.  She and her husband are going to be brave enough to try my latest experimentation.
That should keep me out of trouble for awhile, because the one thing the fat lady enjoys just as much as eating is planning and preparing the next meal to eat! Hee! Hee!

October!!!

It is the first day of my favorite month of the year.  The earthy scents, the leaves flying in the wind, the brilliant hues of the mums contrasting last seasons spent flowers, and the nice cool temperatures setting in after the heat and humidity of summer is always so refreshing.

The only problem is that fall also makes me think of baking rich delicious desserts loaded with apples, pumpkin, lots of sugar, and refined white flour!  Although there are South Beach desserts available, they pale in comparison.  Oh well! The fat lady didn't get fat by eating celery sticks now did she?  The love of food can be such a distraction, and what more can you do but eat it!  Ha! So, I will find a delicious dessert to make, and I will indulge in said dessert, and then I will pay the price on the scale. That is if I am brave enough to step on it.  And, then...  Well?  The fat lady will figure that out later. Hee! Hee!

The fat lady is back...

As you have probably noticed, I was sinking into a depression and dieting failure, placating myself with beer and fast food.  So, I took charge and gave my 2 week notice at work. I felt immediate relief.

My dieting has been a different story. After my long binge eating session, I ended up in a yo-yo half South Beach half junk diet.  The good news is that I am at 191.6, so I haven't gained the weight back I worked so hard at trying to lose; but, I haven't lost any weight either which, of course, is to be expected for naughty people like me.

I have no excuses for my behavior, but I have noticed this trend whenever I try to lose weight: I start to hover around 190 pds,, start getting nervous, and then end up sabotaging my entire diet.  It is not that this diet is even all that restrictive, because I have done plenty of cheating and still manage to lose weight.  This will require more thought, because the 180s are looking very appealing right now.

hmmm.....

Mc Donald's.  Need I say anymore.

Beer...

Iv'e been imbibing in too much beer lately and it is wreaking havoc on my diet!  I have always enjoyed alcoholic beverages occasionally; especially on a relaxing week end, but I think it is affecting my waistline.  I shouldn't try to fool myself--I know it is.  After all, it is one of the choices on the 'to avoid" list in the South Beach book. It not only has lots of carbs in it, but it also causes the munchies for more carbs.  I knew this issue was going to come up, because I do like my beer.  Grrr, now I am afraid to step on the scale.  Do you think I should give it a try?  Ok, be right back--193.4.  I did gain back a couple of pounds as I knew I would, because I could just feel it on my body clinging to me, as those nasty fat cells do, like wet jeans after you jump into a cold lake.

Ok, no time to cry over spilled beer. It is time to get back my resolve and start to behave myself again.  Bahhhh, behaving is no fun, but my body will thank me for it in the long run; then I will be a singing skinny lady with the health and wellness I need to chase around my active grandchild and even more active husband. Hee! Hee!

Having a bit of a stand still reading super charged South beach. Also having a stand still in the activity department. I will update when I get myself together here.

I did it...

I ended up eating that high glycemic, but satisfying dinner I was looking for since last week end.  My daughter and grandbaby came over and we ordered out Italian.  I had the spaghetti and meatballs in this lovely tomato sauce.  It came with garlic bread, but guilt dictated that I give it to my daughter and grandbaby which they appreciated.  I did have a salad also; they make the best house salads. Cannoli for dessert, of course.

 Immediately afterwards, I started to get that heavy sleepy feeling that you get when piling in the refined carbs, but it is done.   No time to mourn the weight loss that this will inevitably disrupt, but I will prevail because I still have my mind set on this adventure, and will continue to pursue it with even greater fervor than before this lapse in judgement and dieting decorum.

Ha! Ha! Ha!

Will I falter???

I am now down to 191.6.  I haven't been feeling any particular cravings as of late, but last week I wanted a Culver's hamburger and fries.  Yes, the hamburger and fries have usurped the potato chips!  At least for now.

There were really no good food choices at the pot luck: I ended up eating the offered fare in smaller portions, but didn't feel satisfied from high glycemic treats as I would normally do.  Is my body chemistry changing?  Is my palate really enjoying cleaner eating? I know my digestive system always gets disrupted in a very negative way after eating these foods, so maybe I shouldn't eat them. Ha!

I do notice that the pounds seem to melt off faster when I incorporate some kind of activity on a regular basis; I only hope I can keep it up, because I can get so lazy, especially as it gets colder outside.

I ended up getting the Supercharge South Beach diet book in the mail yesterday.  I will read it for future reinforcement and reference in this dieting craze I am in.

Oh boy...

Down to 193.2.  Walked to to post office yesterday; it was quite a trek, I am thinking that is the reason for said weight loss.  Will I be bad today?  I have a pot luck to go to, and probably limited South beach choices.  I guess we will see.

behaved...

I behaved today; when I really wanted a hamburger and greasy french fries, I had a salad with 2 nicely sauteed chicken tenders and lots of veg from the garden.  Yum, I guess.  At least my body will be thanking me.

resolve delayed...

I seemed to have my mind set on eating some bad food this week. Yesterday I was called off work and invited myself to my daughter's for supper. I ended up bringing fatty artichoke dip, chips, cheese and crackers, etc.  I was very sick afterwords from the richness of these foods; then I went to work today and ended up coming home early, went grocery shopping, and bought chips and junk; and then I ate junk along with beer.

Sorry, had a big long vent about work, but had to take it off; hubster says it is politically incorrect to complain about work situations online. Felt good at the time though.

Next 2 days off for self reflection and, hopefully, self control.

Now that it is over...

The wedding week end is done, and I'd say overall I didn't do too badly.  Some of these restaurants weren't all that good.  For instance the holiday Inn we stayed at had good room service, but in the restaurant we had the prepacked heated up food you'd find at Chlies or Applebees; doesn't anyone take raw food and cook it anymore?  The chicken I ordered did have grill marks on it, but that was the only highlight. The green beans were limp and coated in a weird sweet sauce, and my ceasar salad was wilted.  So, it went on like that; maybe I am just used to eating real whole food right now--that is a good thing.

Have had plenty of produce from the garden, making stuffed peppers with my peppers from my garden, tuna salad in tomato cups(tomatoes are bountiful this year), and lots of pickles and salads.

So, resolve continues, although I won't step on the scale for a few days, just to be on the safe side. Ha! Ha!

Nervous...

Well, the wedding is tomorrow, and I lost the 10 pounds I was hoping to lose-not thin, but don't feel as heavy and bloated, thanks to cleaner food.  I almost went off the wagon early yesterday: my daughter and I didn't feel like cooking, so we went to Culvers. I wanted a greasy hamburger and fries, but ended up with a cup of chili and a salad.  Of course fast food, no matter what it is, is not good for you, but I think given the alternatives, I did pretty good.

Tonight will be another obstacle, because we will be hoteling it and eating out.  I will try to continue to behave based on food choices offered; but tomorrow, I make no promises, although I feel a little nervous and guilty about it.  Maybe, I will simply stick to my resolve and continue to choose the legal foods. nahhhh! I really doubt it!  LOL!

Insightful...

I watched a really good documentary today on Netflix streaming "Forks Over Knives."   It gives a lot of insight in nutrition and environmental impact.  Makes me believe that there are sane people still left in the world.

Only a couple more days until the wedding, and I am now fearing the gluttony I will give into; as if I won't stop there; that it will continue into next week. Ah well, I will do the best I can and be honest with myself in the only place I have been so far--this blog!  Wish me luck!

Ahhhh..........

Feeling pretty good  today. I stepped on the scale this morning just for giggles and found that I am now at 194.4.
Yeah!  Then I went for a bike ride with the hubby. He put a heart rate monitor on me to see if I was stressing myself; we found that my rates were pretty good. He wrote them all down: I went 16.32 miles which actually felt a lot better than the last time.  I did it in 1 hour 19 minutes at 12.35 mph average. I had 122 beats per minute average with a max of 160 beats per minute.  And, I burned 676 calories, which goes to show you that you can't really lose weight without exercise.

New resolve = relaxation

Venting...

Now that my work weekend is done, I still feel frustrated and angry about the situations that happened. It has always been hard for me to forget or forgive very easily; actually, I hold a grudge like a bull, especially when I know I am in the right. But, the problem is that I am now on the first day of a week long vacation and this same shit keeps racing through my mind: What could I have said? would it made a difference even if what I said made sense to that particular stupid person? My coworker and really good friend said it wouldn't. She always says that person is an idiot , and  will get hers in return---just wait.  She has such patience!  

Yes, I did overeat again last night: the stuff that is on the diet plan, but nonetheless more calories than I needed.

I did go for a walk today, and will probably go for another tonight, so I can start getting back on that path of feeling good about myself.  

Ok, venting felt good.  Now I want to go to another subject:  planning or doing.

I sometimes wonder when I go on these diets, if I am simply caught up in the list making aspect rather than the carry through.  For example: I listed all my sodium, sugar, fats, etc. instead of trusting the diet plan, which has worked in the past.  I find that when I am listing things I should do and plan to do, I end up not doing them.  It is like a never ending grocery list and the store just keeps getting bigger, and more overwhelming.  Next step: start doing.  Was that a listed item?

Heavy...

I have been watching this A&E series about morbidly obese people. Although I am not to that point, I can relate to their love of food and reasons for eating it.  I have learned quite a bit from watching these stories.  For instance, I always seem to make excuses for why I can't exert myself more physically.  The trainers on this show have these people doing very strenuous routines. It is amazing how far the body, even a heavy body can be pushed, and I don't have the diabetes or high blood pressure that these people have.  It really does give me inspiration to push myself more, with no more excuses for why I can't do something.

I really think this blog thing is keeping me honest.  I believe in the past I have always been able to just shove things under the rug.  I am now holding myself accountable for every decision I make--good or bad.

So...

I went for a walk.

Had a bad day...

I had a bad night last night at work.  I was frustrated still when I got home and drank 2 beers, ate a big bowl of popcorn with butter, and cheese and crackers.  Just to add to the torture, I stepped on the scale this morning and found that I am now up to 198; so much for getting below my plateau.  I think that my confidence and self esteem play a large part in this whole weight problem I've had for so many years.  I know I am very good at what I do, but when some little disagreement comes up at work, I just start doubting myself immediately, and then I get depressed, and then I start eating to soothe those uncomfortable feelings.

Confidence: something to work on old lady!

Because, you are a good person!

Wow...

Well, I finally jumped off the plateau I was on for at least 2 weeks by 1 pound.  I currently reside at 196, and I only attribute this to the added exercise this week.  I was true to myself and actually stayed with it.  This is a must to continue.  I actually took 2 walks yesterday: One by myself, and then later on I walked to the goat farm with my daughter and grandbaby, and can she walk fast!  I told her if I walked with her on all my days off, I'd lose all my weight! Lol!

In other news, I ended up ordering a bunch of South Beach books off Amazon.  I really like this particular plan, because it seems to suit me the closes to what I can tolerate in the dieting world.  I ordered a quick and easy cook book, a more variety cook book, a holiday and party cook book, and a supercharged exercise and diet book.  My obsessiveness dictated these purchases, but I really think I will find usefulness in them.  Oh yes, I also ordered a carbs and fat book.  I think along with gluttony, I have trouble in food choices in these areas.
So, with this arsenal behind me, a new resolve in exercise, and good advice from loved ones, I should succeed in this quest--positive thinking, positive thinking, positive thinking.......

portion size...

I was talking to my son and he said that he lost weight by reducing his portion size and by always leaving a little on his plate. I have always had problems with portion size: when I was younger and had great metabolism, I would eat large amounts of food, and then burn it off.  I never worried about how much I ate, and  I always ate pretty healthy food overall, but as the years go by and you go to the resturaunt, the portion sizes slowly get bigger and bigger, and you start to incorporate those portion sizes to the ones at home.  I have been seduced by the food industry and feel a little angry about it as I go onto my next phase of dieting: limiting the amount I eat.
This has and is going to be the most difficult thing for me to do. I mean, what is a acceptable portion size anyway?  Eat slowly and quit when you are full.  Huh! What's that? I have never felt full, except after a huge Thanksgiving dinner.  I did try a little of that today, but it made me nervous, and then I had the munchies, and then I ate munchy things.  Better luck tomorrow, hopefully.

In other news, I did go for a bike ride with the hubby.  The first one this year, so that will actually be 3 days of exercise this week, so I am at least on track with that venue of my plan.  The ride was hard on my heavy body, just doing 16 miles to start. I will try to continue though, because once I get used to it, biking is very enjoyable.

Exercise...

I guess I need to reapproach the whole exercise thing now.  I haven't really been doing much of that this year, for whatever reason. Of course, I could come up with many excuses, but why try to explain things away--I simply haven't been, except for the occasional walk.  Exercise always seems to make me feel better, and if I eat right, helps me to lose weight, so with that in mind, I went for my first official walk today, and plan to continue walking at least 4 times a week to start.  If I go gung ho, I know I will fail.  I would also like to start riding bike with the hubby again--I actually miss that.

Staying on track now with my new resolve in the eating department.  My daughter brought over a couple chocolate zucchini cupcakes (yumm), but I didn't eat them.  Extra treat for the skinny hubby. lol!

Starting over...

Friday and Saturday were very difficult days for me.  Fell off the wagon, lost the horse, and had to walk home.  Saturday night I went grocery shopping with the hubby after a long morning of yard work; needless to say, I had the munchies, and then my sweet husband comes up and whisper in my ear, "I feel like being naughty."  I ended up buying reduced fat ruffles and a Kashi pizza which I ate on my last day of Phase 1.  I have been on a stand still in weight reduction all week, so a little frustration sent me over the edge. The beer was good too.

Today has been going well. Started Phase 2 with steel-cut oatmeal and strawberries--very good after all those eggs. For lunch was mediterranean salad with chicken and bulgar--that was very good also. Tonight the hubster and I are going to make a nice vegetarian soup together. He eats bread with his, lucky fellow.  Right now I don't have the crazy munchies, so that is good, and one can only feel guilty about set backs for so long, or else one just gives up and quits.

Around the horizon is exercise.  Hmmm......

Fell off the Wagon!!

Yes, I fell off the extreme dieting wagon, with only a few days left on phase 1.  I was having a bad day, feeling moody, frustrated, sad, and, of course, hungry, so I went to Walgreens with the intent to buy shampoo, body wash, and potato chips--which I did. And, I ate those potato chips, my cryptomite, and just like Superman, they didn't make me feel very good:  too salty and greasy after eating all that healthy food.  Interesting.  Needless to say, I don't feel hungry anymore, because they filled that empty spot reserved just for potato chips.  I will not step on the scale today. Why torture myself!?!

In other news, I am getting off that meat wagon also, by incorporating more vegetarian dishes as replacements for certain dishes. The only thing is that they have to include only legal fare for this diet.  There is a list in the South Beach book.  I have a few sirloin patties left, then no more beef!  I have always included a little chicken into my diet, so I will just cut down on the chicken dishes.

My first vegetarian dish will be a nice soup, with leeks, collard greens, and I am going to add edamame beans to it. This is actually a recipe in the book for Phase 1, and it can be frozen, so I don't have to spend so much time in the kitchen preparing fancy meals. Yeah!

The results...

Based on a 2000 calorie diet with 2400 mg of sodium being the cut off, I consumed 2,025mg of sodium. That was surprising, because I really thought it would be more.  What is more surprising was the sugar count with the cut off being 40g of sugar, I consumed 40g exactly.  That was 2 weight watchers raspberry ice cream bars and a chobani greek yogurt. Feeling a little more hopeful, I added up the RDA for fat with 65g being the cut off, I consumed 91g.  Oops! Where did that come from with all this South beach diet food I am eating?  I suppose it is hell of a lot less than on my regular diet that got me where I am today!  Maybe I don't want to know how much fat I used to consume. So, I have convinced myself that it is no big deal.

Sugar...

And, since I can't leave anything alone, I have investigated sugar also. It doesn't have a RDA(recommended daily allowance), but it is suggested that one doesn't go over 40g of sugar a day.  I have probably, on a regular basis, exceeded that in one bite! lol! So, as well as sodium counting, I am going to count sugar. Woo! Hoo! Doesn't this sound like fun!
By the way my daughter, the fabulous baker, made some zucchini-banana muffins with flax seeds in them, and I am eating that tonight with my coffee. Don't care if it is a refined carb.

Sodium...

Ok, so I am continuing my research on salt. I looked up the daily allowance of salt(sodium) on some websites, and have found that it is 2,400mg for a 2,000 calorie diet.  Just for fun, or curiosity, or something new to obsess about I am going to count up how much sodium I am putting into my body daily.
In the Dukan Diet book, the doc said that peri-menopausal and menopausal women have a more difficult time losing weight, because of our hormones being out of whack. We also have more of a tendency for bloating and water retention. Maybe, if I can get the salt thing under control, I will feel better. It is worth a shot.  I already take progesterone cream for the mood swing and that helps a lot.
So, tomorrow is salt obsession day!  Yeah!

salt...

Now that I looked at the sodium content in soda, I started looking at the sodium content in everything!  I bought these sugar-free jello mousse cups to get me through the dessert crazies and now find that they have 100mg of sodium where a coke zero has 70!
I remember going through this exact obsessive searching for all the bad stuff every time I am on a diet. I read all the labels in the grocery store and start to go mad with the thought that I can't have things that I think are not bad for me, but, in fact, are!  I know in my mind that the simpler and purer you keep the food the better it is for you, but after years of being controlled by substances like sugar fat, salt, and advertising, my weaknesses are starting to rear their dirty little fat heads.
I think once I get past this last week of phase 1, I will start to smooth out after a serving of real fruit, fruit and yogurt smoothies, and some grains.  Extreme dieting sucks!
My daughter-in-law gave me an alternate vegetarian diet plan. I may incorporate this into the South Beach, just to switch things up a bit and get away from all that meat.  We'll see. I haven't given up yet. I just need to work through these little crises as I go along.  Hence, why I started this blog.

Diet Soda...

While reading the Dukan Diet book, I came across a section where the good doc encouraged his readers to have a diet soda, so that the dieter wouldn't feel completely deprived, so I took this advice, against my better judgement, and started drinking diet soda.  I have never thought it was an acceptable beverage, especially when you are always hearing that it changes your body chemistry and doesn't actually replenish you of the fluids you need.  And, it has sodium in it!
So, I am through with that momentary relapse and will now continue with water, a pure and simple beverage that doesn't make me feel bloated and puffy, and unhealthy, and stupid for falling for dumb advertising from controlling conglomerates.

Finally...

Reached my first plateau.  197.8.  Now the weight loss will probably slow down to a pound or 2 a week instead of every day. I get so hungry when I lose it too fast. I can now beat myself up for having bad thoughts about pizza and potato chips, because I didn't lose any weight and those things would definitely make me gain.
1 more week on phase 1 of South Beach diet.  So looking foward to a bowl of oatmeal and a piece of fruit. It seems like mana right now. Phase 2 is much more accommodating in the food choices and variety. All still healthy fare though, mustn't forget that this is also about making better food choices and enjoying them.
Will I still slip off this dieting wagon and have those old potato chips? Yes, I probably will, because potato chips have always been my cryptomite, and I am not superman! Lol!

Thinner...

I feel like I am in that book/movie "Thinner" by Stepehen King where the guy has a curse on him that makes hims lose weight until there is nothing left to him.  I know I have a long way to go, but each day I step on the scale and it shows me that I am a pound thinner than the day before.  My plateau has to be around the corner at some point here!  This is too unnerving, so unnerving, in fact, that I want to go eat some big pizza pies to celebrate my weight loss, knowing full well that it will all go back onto my body!
Slower weight loss is frustrating, but reliable, at least to me it is.
Ok, no pizza for now, but I could go for a nice big bag of potato chips! lol!

BMI...OMG!

While reading the Dukan Diet book I came across a section where the good doc teaches about  health and wellness. He says to go online and find out what your body mass index is with 27 being the cut off and 29 being obese. I plug in my height and weight to find out that at 205 pds I am at a 31. With the recent weight loss down to 200, I am a 30! Still, and I hate to see myself this way, obese!  Isn't that the way it is though. We ignore our clothes getting tighter, ignore the scale, stop looking in the mirror as much, make excuses for why the seat belt seems to have to be stretched a little more when putting it on, blame breathlessness on humidity, and on and on.
Is this incentive? Yes, for the moment it is. So, I am replacing the heeby jeebies with more glasses of water and, I won't lie, sugar-free popscicles.

I finished reading the Dukan Diet book with some reserve as to actually trying it. While some of the information makes a lot of sense, the meat eating is abhorrent.  I am already having trouble with the meat eating I am doing now!  I think that once I reach a plateau in this diet, my frustration will drive me to that extreme.  In the meantime, I am losing weight too fast right now. Each day I step on the scale it is a pound lighter. This is alarming, because when it doe s start to inevitably slow down will go into panic phase. I am not ready for that!  I figure if I can stick to this diet until the wedding, and really enjoy a good fattening meal and lots of alchohol at the reception, I will be doing pretty good to start all over afterwards. Wishful thinking? Eh, probably, but this food addict will have her dessert before plunging back into reserve and food mind control.

Meltdown...

I am seriously going through a dieting meltdown right now,after losing 5 pounds within 5 days(probably just water), and feeling the heeby jeebies from eating no fruit or bread. I always lose weight in my back first. I know this by the way my bra fits. That part is a nice feeling, but the nervousness that follows is no fun at all.  I looked at the recipes for this weekend and just freaked out, because I work this weekend and the recipes are way to fancy to prepare.I Know I kind of just jumped into this right off the juicing wagon, so I didn't really prepare myself as in simplifying these recipes for more normal people with things that normal people like to do--not being in the kitchen most of the day!!  I did eventually work it out though. My plan is to look a head, modify the recipes, then make up the majority of the recipes for the day in the morning.  I can't wait for the second phase, so I can just eat a bowl of oatmeal--getting so tired of eggs. Eggs! Every single day! OK feel better now!

Feeling a little nervous...

My book "The Dukan Diet" showed up in the mail yesterday, but the night before I was talking to one of my coworkers about her failed attempt on this diet.  She said she got so bored of the restricted regiment of meat and every other day meat and veg, she just stopped it altogether.  I have started reading said book and was quite alarmed within the first few pages about his discussion of pure protein mostly in the form of meat.  While on the South Beach Diet, I have been increasing my meat eating, which is difficult for a semi-vegetarian like myself, so the thought of just eating meat for 7 days to start in the Attack Phase has me a bit overwhelmed. I did continue to read the introduction of this book, and I do, at the same time, kind of understand the physiological reasoning behind this approach, but wonder if like my coworker, I will become dissatisfied with the choices presented.
In the meantime, I continue on the South Beach diet with some modicum of success, 4 pounds to be exact, but who hasn't lost 4-5 pounds in the beginning of diets before. If I were to lose 10 pounds, I would start feeling a little more hopeful. I feel like some kind of dieting expert, because I have been on sooo many of them. Simple self control? Forget about it, some people need to be bossed around a bit. On that note, I will continue to read Dr. Dukan's book with an open mind.

Waiting...

I am still waiting for the Dukan Diet book I ordered on a whim last week. I keep looking out on the front porch for my cure to obesity to show up all wrapped in celephane and ready for me to read with great anticipation--like a really good Stephen King novel.  In the meantime, I continue on my "mock" South Beach diet.  I think when I did this diet 5 years ago, I ended up just cutting out most of the carbs, and not making all the fancy dishes which can be very time-consuming and annoying for a food addict to go through. The more time spent with the food, the more obsessing happens. I have hunger pangs, if you want to call them that, on and off, but have been sticking to the legal fare of celery, lowfat cheese, walnuts, and don't forget those sugar-free fudgesicles that actually save the day. Yumm!! they are actually delicious.

Again....

So, last night after my healty "South beach" entre, I had 3 ooey gooey cookie bars, then went to the movies with my hubby and helped eat a big tub of popcorn and soda.  Felt like a failure on my first day, but have behaved on the second...so far.  My biggest obstacle right now is dressing: olive oil and different types of vinegars and lemon juice required, but a little boring on the palate of a rich, sugary dressing lover like myself.
10 pounds by the wedding please--just keep telling myself that.

The Next Morning

Well, it is the next morning after my food rant, and I am still feeling determined to continue along the same dieting path--for better or worse. I just know I am tired of being this fat and everything that goes with it. I may even stick with it for a few days. Ha! Ha!
Ok, so today went to store and bought all items for next few days on "South Beach Diet". As I have said, it has been successful in the past, just until I get my new book THE DUKAN DIET(ominous sound effect).  I was listening to the John Tesh show on the way home from work 1 night--he always gives interesting tidbits on how to improve your life in between bad 80s music and soft rock. Anyway, he found a study that implied that people who keep a food diary tend to lose more weight, so with that in mind, and being on my last rope, I have decided to do some of that here today. Will I continue it? Who knows, probably as long as the last potato chip crossed my lips. Hmmmm, potato chips, how I yearn for thee.
so, today I had scrambled eggs with zucchini, a low fat string cheese for snack, and 2 chicken tenders on a bed of romaine with a balsamic vinegarette. sugar-free jello cup for dessert. Tonight is salmon with steamed asparagus. Well, that listing of food was kind of annoying and painful. Thank goodness I don't have any set rules to my ranting about food! OH glorious food!
OK getting a little delirious, so will sign off for now.

starting out...

Ok, this is my first post on my first blog. Feeling a little shy about it now, but will muddle through. I have really started this blog as kind of a journal to get me through my umpteenth diet craze. I have recently found myself to be fat, miserable, tired, and slow. No room for singing at this juncture. So, I will tell you about my insane attempt at recent weight loss thus far. I bought a juicer thinking it to be the miracle cure I had been looking for, only to end up with a massive headache and a growling stomach before the day was even through. Needless to say, i ate everything in sight to recooperate form my supposed lack of nutrition. This diet failed or I failed it. Either way, I will continue to juice, because of the vitamins and minerals that can be obtained from just one drink. taste? Eh, it grows on you as long as you keep thinking, "mmmm, kale juice is sooo good for me!"
While I wait for my next diet book to show up "The Dukan Diet" to be explained later, I am going on a mock south beach diet to prepare myself for my next hopefully not failure in the dieting world. I have last weight on south beach in the past, but it is not a diet I was able to stick with in the long run.
Ok, that is enough for starters. I will try to figure out this blog stuff as I go along.